Grace by Richard Paul Evans

I would - Grace Webb

If only i could shine in your life as you have in mine, I would,
If only i could love you as deeply as you have loved me, I would,
If only i could heal your heart as you have healed mine, I would,
If only i could lead you to God as you have led me, I would,
If only i could give you the hope that you have given me, I would,

If only i could stay with you forever, I would.

This is the poem written by Grace in the novel for Eric in her diary.

This was a very touching novel. I picked it up quite by accident thinking it would give me some "Godly" gyan on life (yes.. i always search for stuff like this when i am onsite.. queer isn't it?). It was very touching in the sense, it touched that corner of me that still believes in romance, unblemished love, the ideal kind of love rather.. the teenage kind of idealized love.. the kind of love that borders on worship. (My diverging mind tells me this brings us to two kinds of people - people who conquer love and people who give out completely to love.)

Brings to my mind the feelings i experienced when i watched "Kizhakku Vasal" (Karthik & Khusboo - 1990 - Tamil) and what amma said about the lovers in "Ek Duje ke liye".

This book is a quick read and covers a child abuse. I feel this will touch anybody ,who is a bit of a romantic, in a very moving way.

State of Play

State of Play I saw State of Play in the AMC @ Saratoga. Nice theatre. Standard fare in most theatres here. Didn't know that noon shows are usually priced lesser when compared to the evening shows. Nice way to attract crowds. Well, it is common sense now that i think of it. Like old times, i reached right on time to see the ads & the trailers. The ads were quite pathetic, well, trailers were good. Just watching the trailers make you want to watch the movie. Well, i have listed star wars, wolverine .. etc. Surprisingly, i had not listed State of Play in my list of must watch, when i saw the trailer of this movie. it turned out to be a good movie. Fast paced, suspense, an investigation - all that it takes for a thriller. A must watch movie, now that i think of it. Ben Affleck plays the role of a manipulative politician well. Russel Crowe & his partner play the roles of journalists well. I keep wondering how these chaps keep switching from being completely out of shape like in this movie to a well built and well muscled person like in Gladiator. What additional i liked about the movie was perhaps the fact that i had to try to put the pieces together myself and use my brain a bit, which was really nice. Politicians in india don't have to be circumspect about their nefarious activities as perhaps censure by people is very less. Here in America, politicians have to be careful esp about the media. I am always surprised by people like the politician in this movie who use people with impunity. I feel so very awkward to ask a favor of anyone and this person and so many others i know use people without any qualms. The fact that there has to be a payback is apparently just a way of life. Exchanging favors seems to be easy for so many and so difficult for me. I don't mind doing a favor, but find it so very difficult calling on one. Ben Affleck in the movie uses the services of a mentally unstable chap and gets a person murdered. Now that is one big favor. Then comes the question of correct & wrong. Was it correct to expose your friend? Is it correct to expose a family member? Are there certain rules written in stone? In a real situation, I would have gone ahead and exposed Ben Affleck as the chap used me. Would i have done that if Ben were a close family member? I wonder. The reason i don't write about the plot in the movie is because i don't think i am narrating a story in this write-up. I am trying to capture what i felt as a result of watching the movie.

Death in the Holy Orders

I picked up this 2 part TV episode (BBC) from the Martin Luther King Library @ San jose. My first exposure to P D James.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Death_in_Holy_Orders

Nice one. The suspense was on till the end. There was this intriguing bit about a possible papyrus which could have questioned the validity of resurrection of Christ. Well, the entire life of christ seems so much of a mystery. It is bound to be considering that it is the foundation for one of the most followed religions in the world and has been the cause of numerous wars. Interesting. There was this other thought about Mary Magdalene being his wife. Seems to be an time fraught with people trying to take an alternative view on established norms.

Gridiron Gang

This was quite a drab movie. No energy, the actors seemed to be going through their motions and the "Rock" seemed like an angel dropped from heaven. It however is based on a true story. Hats off to the true events but failed as movie.

It failed as an inspirational movie from the sports genre. A good movie in this genre is "Remember the Titans". Now that was a good movie. That drove home some good points.
1. The fact that man competes with himself rather than with anybody else
2. Life in the pursuit of a dream / ideal much bigger than oneself is worth living.

Churchill's Triumph - A novel of betrayal

I liked this book. The history buff that i am, this book covers the happenings in the 6 days at the famed Yalta Conference. It is nice to see leaders as human beings with their failings. It is quite sad to see (as i long suspected) them making decisions that change the course of history, with partisan and private ambitions and nothing remotely exalted or a sense of responsibility towards people who are to be influenced by these decisions.

Deals struck at that point for whatever reasons have changed the course of history so much. Poland remained under the communist fist till as much as the early 90s. Generations of people have been born, lived & died under regimes created through such decisions. (Well, there is also the question, is it that bad living in a communist regime as made out by the western media. Life goes on there as well. Iraq seemed stable under saddam, Yugoslavia under Tito and so on and so forth. All hell broke loose when the regimes collapsed). The sense of Freedom is so much an illusion.

Roosevelt's agenda was the United Nations with the sole ambition of leaving a footprint in history. (Reminded me of Jinnah. A Britisher in many ways who was instrumental in the creation of Pakistan - an islamic nation, a religion he did not even practise and a nation he did not live long to see on its foot). Stalin's ambition was conquest and he was naked in his ambitions with all others eager to appease. It gives credence to the idea that rules are for the common mass. It doesn't apply to the powerful. Churcill's agenda is something i would not comment on considering that it is a book rather in praise of him. It is made to seem that all decisions were made in an effort to stop the spread of the "Red" influence with a plan to willify Stalin and with an exalted aim of creating ideals that generations would follow. Well, it seems rather far fetched if that was indeed his plan or agenda.

It also reminds me that all of us face decisions and dilemma in all walks of our life where we are forced to follow illusory creations. I remember facing humiliations to be in front of a line to get into a crowded bus to head home in the territory created by the bus driver & conductor. Illusions and rules that all follow to go ahead in life. Weird. I guess end of day, man sets limitations on himself. Freedom is just a term that a man can define for himself.